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danceswithgaryThe Adventure Started Here
Facing the rear of the knight commander's horse as she bumped along, the UDKM held tight to the valise that held Princess Angeline's favorite pink-striped taffeta dress and her second-best tiara. The black-moustachioed knight, who'd introduced himself as Sir Freddy, had carefully questioned the LUHM until he was able to identify the dragons in question. Selecting three brave companion knights, Sir Joshua, Sir Max, and Sir Eric, they had all mounted their chargers and set off on their perilous mission.
Fortunately, for the sake of the UDKM's future ability to ever sit comfortably again, after bouncing on the back of the dashing charger without the benefit of extra padding, the dragons' cave was within two days' ride of the castle. No one was sure how dangerous the two dragons were since they only knew their names from the conversation the LUHM had overheard while she was being wound up in the pink satin sheet. She had described them as enormous with razor-sharp claws and pointed fangs. She had also complained about their sulfurous breath and appalling backcountry accents which had made them quite difficult to understand.
No one else at the castle had been able to supply any further details about the two dragons named Alina and McDuff beyond a rumor that claimed their cave was located on the western side of Mount Carrock.
Arriving at the base of the mountain at sunset, an argument about whether or not to wait until morning to storm the cave was settled when the UDKM pointed out that fighting in the dark gave a natural advantage to dragons that lived the gloom of caves. Reluctantly, the knights settled in around a small campfire and shared the bread and cheese the UDKM had packed for them. Listening to the wolves howl in the forest around them, the UDKM was glad that four large men, who had much more meat on their bones to attract any hungry predators, surrounded her. While they were being eaten, she'd just slip away unnoticed.
She didn't share that thought with the knights.
The sun woke them all quite rudely the next morning, shining in their eyes. The UDKM was reminded of Princess Angeline's golden curls when she saw Sir Joshua's equally golden set of curls. She decided to avoid sleeping anywhere near the two on the way back to the castle to avoid being blinded by a stray early morning sunbeam reflecting off double the amount of gleaming hair. Sir Freddy was much safer to be around with his dark hair and skin and Sir Eric with the flame-red hair was a close second. She hadn't decided whether Sir Max belonged in the list because he had no hair at all.
After a rather boring breakfast of bread and cheese, the same dismal meal they'd had for the past five meals, which left the UDKM wishing that she'd thought to pack a pot of Princess Angeline's strawberry jam; they began to climb the mountain heading straight for the dark mouth of the cave they could see above them. They were almost certain it was the dragons' cave. The wisps of smoke that puffed out of the black depths every now and again were a good hint. The UDKM suggested staying behind to mind the horses and the fire, but the knights insisted that she stay with them and that they would keep her safe from the wolves. Having to choose between angry knights, being eaten by wolves or burnt up by dragons was really no choice at all, so the UDKM sighed heavily and, with exceedingly heavy feet, followed the four brave knights up the mountain.
She didn't even bother to grumble aloud because no one would have been able to hear her over the exceedingly noisy rattle of the knights' armor and the clomping of heavy feet. Her sole consolation was that the knights were in front of her and the dragons would burn them up first, giving her a chance to run back down the mountain, mount one of the chargers, and escape the wolves.
She thought it was one of her better plans, almost as good as the one where she'd accidentally on purposely spilled water all over the flagstones in front of the kitchen and then left the window open so that the water had frozen during the night, producing a perfectly slippery patch of ice. Of course, that ice patch was right where the previous UDKM had walked out of the kitchen the next morning carrying the heavy silver tray holding Princess Angeline's milk and strawberry jam toast. One broken leg later, she was no longer the lower downstairs kitchen maid, but the newest UDKM carrying that heavy silver tray.
She was really quite good at thinking up clever ways to get what she wanted, as long as she was allowed a little time to think. King Rick had rushed her the day of the dragon-napping. With a few extra minutes, she would have avoided both the dungeon and this horribly uncomfortable and life-threatening situation. In fact, she was thinking of as many different plans as possible while she climbed up the mountain behind the knights. As a result, she was the only one prepared when Alina and McDuff appeared in the mouth of the cave, steaming and hissing in their atrocious low country accents. She really didn't consider swinging swords randomly as being ready for anything, just a way for the brave knights to look especially foolish.
Thinking back on the LUHM's description of the enormous, vicious beasts that had stolen Princess Angeline, the UDKM was admittedly surprised at the dragons' appearance. They were only a trifle taller than a very tall man, and their claws and teeth were only moderately sharp at best. In fact, the only truly horribly awful thing about them was the fact that Alina's scales were a hideous mix of scarlet and puce, and McDuff's were aqua and melon with a hint of lavender around the edges. Separately, they might have been tolerable; together, they caused a great deal of blinking and wincing on the part of anyone catching sight of the unfortunate mix of colors.
To be sure, no one would want to encounter them accidentally while out on a stroll because they certainly possessed the ability to breathe fire hot enough to melt a sword, which they had just proved by melting all four randomly swinging swords. The brave knights also ended up with some painful burns on their sword hands, which they bravely ignored as they huddled in front of the cave trying to think of what they should do next.
Peering around the knights' huddle, the UDKM caught a glimpse of golden curls and a grubby white lace nightgown, along with two dainty bare feet, which were stomping quite emphatically on the cave floor behind the two dragons. In addition, the UDKM was sure that she could hear the same high-pitched shrieks that she had once overheard issuing from Princess Angeline's bedroom when her favorite pink-striped taffeta gown was at the laundry and not available to wear. Her conclusion was that Princess Angeline was unharmed and that there was a distinct possibility that if she gathered her courage and spoke to the dragons, she could come up with a brilliant plan to save the princess.
If not, she supposed she'd end up in the same condition as the melted randomly swinging swords, and the four brave knights would be on their own.
Part Four
Facing the rear of the knight commander's horse as she bumped along, the UDKM held tight to the valise that held Princess Angeline's favorite pink-striped taffeta dress and her second-best tiara. The black-moustachioed knight, who'd introduced himself as Sir Freddy, had carefully questioned the LUHM until he was able to identify the dragons in question. Selecting three brave companion knights, Sir Joshua, Sir Max, and Sir Eric, they had all mounted their chargers and set off on their perilous mission.
Fortunately, for the sake of the UDKM's future ability to ever sit comfortably again, after bouncing on the back of the dashing charger without the benefit of extra padding, the dragons' cave was within two days' ride of the castle. No one was sure how dangerous the two dragons were since they only knew their names from the conversation the LUHM had overheard while she was being wound up in the pink satin sheet. She had described them as enormous with razor-sharp claws and pointed fangs. She had also complained about their sulfurous breath and appalling backcountry accents which had made them quite difficult to understand.
No one else at the castle had been able to supply any further details about the two dragons named Alina and McDuff beyond a rumor that claimed their cave was located on the western side of Mount Carrock.
Arriving at the base of the mountain at sunset, an argument about whether or not to wait until morning to storm the cave was settled when the UDKM pointed out that fighting in the dark gave a natural advantage to dragons that lived the gloom of caves. Reluctantly, the knights settled in around a small campfire and shared the bread and cheese the UDKM had packed for them. Listening to the wolves howl in the forest around them, the UDKM was glad that four large men, who had much more meat on their bones to attract any hungry predators, surrounded her. While they were being eaten, she'd just slip away unnoticed.
She didn't share that thought with the knights.
The sun woke them all quite rudely the next morning, shining in their eyes. The UDKM was reminded of Princess Angeline's golden curls when she saw Sir Joshua's equally golden set of curls. She decided to avoid sleeping anywhere near the two on the way back to the castle to avoid being blinded by a stray early morning sunbeam reflecting off double the amount of gleaming hair. Sir Freddy was much safer to be around with his dark hair and skin and Sir Eric with the flame-red hair was a close second. She hadn't decided whether Sir Max belonged in the list because he had no hair at all.
After a rather boring breakfast of bread and cheese, the same dismal meal they'd had for the past five meals, which left the UDKM wishing that she'd thought to pack a pot of Princess Angeline's strawberry jam; they began to climb the mountain heading straight for the dark mouth of the cave they could see above them. They were almost certain it was the dragons' cave. The wisps of smoke that puffed out of the black depths every now and again were a good hint. The UDKM suggested staying behind to mind the horses and the fire, but the knights insisted that she stay with them and that they would keep her safe from the wolves. Having to choose between angry knights, being eaten by wolves or burnt up by dragons was really no choice at all, so the UDKM sighed heavily and, with exceedingly heavy feet, followed the four brave knights up the mountain.
She didn't even bother to grumble aloud because no one would have been able to hear her over the exceedingly noisy rattle of the knights' armor and the clomping of heavy feet. Her sole consolation was that the knights were in front of her and the dragons would burn them up first, giving her a chance to run back down the mountain, mount one of the chargers, and escape the wolves.
She thought it was one of her better plans, almost as good as the one where she'd accidentally on purposely spilled water all over the flagstones in front of the kitchen and then left the window open so that the water had frozen during the night, producing a perfectly slippery patch of ice. Of course, that ice patch was right where the previous UDKM had walked out of the kitchen the next morning carrying the heavy silver tray holding Princess Angeline's milk and strawberry jam toast. One broken leg later, she was no longer the lower downstairs kitchen maid, but the newest UDKM carrying that heavy silver tray.
She was really quite good at thinking up clever ways to get what she wanted, as long as she was allowed a little time to think. King Rick had rushed her the day of the dragon-napping. With a few extra minutes, she would have avoided both the dungeon and this horribly uncomfortable and life-threatening situation. In fact, she was thinking of as many different plans as possible while she climbed up the mountain behind the knights. As a result, she was the only one prepared when Alina and McDuff appeared in the mouth of the cave, steaming and hissing in their atrocious low country accents. She really didn't consider swinging swords randomly as being ready for anything, just a way for the brave knights to look especially foolish.
Thinking back on the LUHM's description of the enormous, vicious beasts that had stolen Princess Angeline, the UDKM was admittedly surprised at the dragons' appearance. They were only a trifle taller than a very tall man, and their claws and teeth were only moderately sharp at best. In fact, the only truly horribly awful thing about them was the fact that Alina's scales were a hideous mix of scarlet and puce, and McDuff's were aqua and melon with a hint of lavender around the edges. Separately, they might have been tolerable; together, they caused a great deal of blinking and wincing on the part of anyone catching sight of the unfortunate mix of colors.
To be sure, no one would want to encounter them accidentally while out on a stroll because they certainly possessed the ability to breathe fire hot enough to melt a sword, which they had just proved by melting all four randomly swinging swords. The brave knights also ended up with some painful burns on their sword hands, which they bravely ignored as they huddled in front of the cave trying to think of what they should do next.
Peering around the knights' huddle, the UDKM caught a glimpse of golden curls and a grubby white lace nightgown, along with two dainty bare feet, which were stomping quite emphatically on the cave floor behind the two dragons. In addition, the UDKM was sure that she could hear the same high-pitched shrieks that she had once overheard issuing from Princess Angeline's bedroom when her favorite pink-striped taffeta gown was at the laundry and not available to wear. Her conclusion was that Princess Angeline was unharmed and that there was a distinct possibility that if she gathered her courage and spoke to the dragons, she could come up with a brilliant plan to save the princess.
If not, she supposed she'd end up in the same condition as the melted randomly swinging swords, and the four brave knights would be on their own.
Part Four