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Gary's Rules of Order...
Mar. 17th, 2010 11:57 am...are not what you might think. In fact, order is an impossible dream in the DWG household.
1. If you drop (place) something on the floor, you only need to pick it up if you need to use it right away. This means the camera case sitting in front of the TV stand will stay there until Val picks it up and puts it away, at which point all hell will break loose because you can't find the camera. Or helmet. Or gloves. Or.... In the meantime, the item nicely offsets the stack of VHS movies that are sitting on the floor instead of on the shelves because you were going through them four months ago.
2. The kitchen table's primary purpose is storage, not eating. Well, there's one spot you can place a cereal bowl and a glass, but the remainder is the prime place for your magazines and junk mail, keys, outdated lists, helmets, and anything else that hasn't been left on the floor (see Rule 1). The couch is where food and beverages are consumed.
3. Items on the desk in the study will remain exactly where you placed them, albeit precariously balanced, until the cows come home...and do the filing for you.
4. The spare room containing the treadmill Val uses is the optimal place for seasonal storage. At least the pajamas taken off three days ago to swap for ski gear are neatly folded in the middle of the floor. Your empty suitcase needs to stay right beside the door instead of being returned to the basement because of a final ski trip pending in three weeks. Ski boots look more artistic when they're not lined up against the wall, as does the box containing the few items of ski clothing not used this season.
5. Val really should have learned by now to watch her feet when walking through the house, especially during the overlap period for ski and motorcycle season.
6. Never look at daughter's room. She learned the rules from you. (see Rule 1 with the addition of used tissues)
*sigh*
I learned years ago that I could either be a raving bitch about housework or just do enough to make my life comfortable (my corner of the room/couch is very tidy) and leave the rest as-is. I consider it a triumph that wet towels are hung up and coats no longer accessorize the loveseat. Occasionally, when Gary is gone for a week or more, I'll break down and put things where they belong and there are no TV trays in the middle of the living room and stacks of papers/magazines dwindle. Then he comes home and it's as if he's marking the place, making sure it's clear that he's back, at least for a while.
1. If you drop (place) something on the floor, you only need to pick it up if you need to use it right away. This means the camera case sitting in front of the TV stand will stay there until Val picks it up and puts it away, at which point all hell will break loose because you can't find the camera. Or helmet. Or gloves. Or.... In the meantime, the item nicely offsets the stack of VHS movies that are sitting on the floor instead of on the shelves because you were going through them four months ago.
2. The kitchen table's primary purpose is storage, not eating. Well, there's one spot you can place a cereal bowl and a glass, but the remainder is the prime place for your magazines and junk mail, keys, outdated lists, helmets, and anything else that hasn't been left on the floor (see Rule 1). The couch is where food and beverages are consumed.
3. Items on the desk in the study will remain exactly where you placed them, albeit precariously balanced, until the cows come home...and do the filing for you.
4. The spare room containing the treadmill Val uses is the optimal place for seasonal storage. At least the pajamas taken off three days ago to swap for ski gear are neatly folded in the middle of the floor. Your empty suitcase needs to stay right beside the door instead of being returned to the basement because of a final ski trip pending in three weeks. Ski boots look more artistic when they're not lined up against the wall, as does the box containing the few items of ski clothing not used this season.
5. Val really should have learned by now to watch her feet when walking through the house, especially during the overlap period for ski and motorcycle season.
6. Never look at daughter's room. She learned the rules from you. (see Rule 1 with the addition of used tissues)
*sigh*
I learned years ago that I could either be a raving bitch about housework or just do enough to make my life comfortable (my corner of the room/couch is very tidy) and leave the rest as-is. I consider it a triumph that wet towels are hung up and coats no longer accessorize the loveseat. Occasionally, when Gary is gone for a week or more, I'll break down and put things where they belong and there are no TV trays in the middle of the living room and stacks of papers/magazines dwindle. Then he comes home and it's as if he's marking the place, making sure it's clear that he's back, at least for a while.