danceswithgary: (McShep - Not So Much)
[personal profile] danceswithgary
This all started with a post by [ profile] sgamadison where she shared a picture of her cat, Simon, and a few of his photoshopped adventures. It made me smile and then inspired me to send Simon on an adventure to Atlantis.

Title: Simon Simon Goes Through The Gate
Author/Artist: danceswithgary
Fandom: SGA
Pairing: Rodney McKay/John Sheppard (but that's a cat's opinion).
Rating: So very, very G that you could read it to young children. Maybe. Well, there is that time....
Warning: This is cracky and extremely pasted-on yay! fun which flirts with canon but never, ever, takes it seriously.
Summary: Simon didn't really expect to get his wish, let alone end up being sucked into a green, whirly whatsis and spat out on a slippery marble floor in a strange dark somewhere most definitely not home.

Simon Goes Through The Gate - Part One

Once there was an ordinary cat named Simon, who lived with Sarah and a big furry goof named Hawkeye.

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Simon was usually content with his life but, every now and then, he wondered what it would be like to have adventures like Hawkeye kept bragging about, although not the kind where Hawkeye came home smelling manky. One night, after listening to a particularly riveting tale about trails and wonderful smells and wild running, Simon looked up and wished upon a star.

Simon didn't really expect to get his wish, let alone end up being sucked into a green, whirly whatsis and spat out on a slippery marble floor in a strange dark somewhere most definitely not home. Fortunately for Simon, cats always land on their feet, although it was looking iffy for the first few seconds.

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It wasn't long before other people began to arrive, walking out of the watery circle and somehow managing to avoid getting wet. Simon thought it was a good trick and decided he'd learn it as soon as possible.

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Simon scampered up the nearest set of stairs to avoid all the tromping feet, and that's when he met his new best friends, McKay and the Major.

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He followed them around as they explored the strange place that McKay and the Major called Atlantis, even joining them at a window to look out at the water completely surrounding them. Yikes!

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It wasn't long before Simon had to choose between going through the circle of water (learning the not-getting-wet trick immediately) or staying where there was water trying to get inside everywhere. There was a very pretty lady named Teyla on the other side of the circle, who made Simon miss Sarah.

And then there was running and shooting and entirely too much adventuring for Simon's taste but, when they finally got back to Atlantis, the water went back where it belonged - outside and under instead of over and all around. Whew!

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Everyone was settling in okay and Simon moved in with McKay - whose other names were Doctor and Rodney - because he understood cats and the importance of regular meals, toys to play with, and a clean litter box. McKay was nice and warm in bed, although he had a habit of drooling on the pillow. Simon hated sleeping on wet spots.

The Major liked playing with McKay too. He even threw McKay over a balcony to watch him bounce like a ball. Simon enjoyed the fun and games until the black smoke came and made everyone unhappy. Simon decided to help McKay send it away and then they both got lots of pets from the Major after the bad smoke was gone.

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After that, Simon got to go through the water circle a lot with his friends. Sometimes they rode in something the Major called a puddlejumper. Simon's tummy didn't feel very good when McKay was driving.

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It was always fun watching the Major and Teyla play with sticks, certainly more fun than walking through dark, damp hallways with McKay.

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It wasn't fun meeting the strange lady who didn't smell right. McKay was angry and threw things at the wall in his room. Personally, Simon thought the Major was silly for not watching her eyes while talking to her.

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Then there was the adventure where everyone was digging in the biggest litter boxes Simon had ever seen.

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At least McKay and the Major realized how important Simon was and traded the bad people the shiny orange toy so Simon could go home to Atlantis. Simon didn't even mind sharing McKay's bed with the Major after that, although it got a little crowded sometimes.

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Things got a little crazy on Atlantis after that adventure - a lot of scary noise and running - so Simon spent most of his time hiding under McKay's bed until it was time to leave through the circle again. It was pretty boring in the gray place on the other side, so Simon just stayed in the room McKay slept in until it was time to travel on a really big puddlejumper. It was big enough that there was more running and shouting. Humans are weird like that.

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End of Part One

Part Two


danceswithgary: (Default)


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